How to talk to your children about HPV (2023)

It’s time to talk to your kids about HPV.

Considering that around 80% of us will get HPV at some point, it isn’t spoken about nearly enough.

It also isn’t tested for in routine sexual health screenings.

This obscurity can mean people feel isolated and afraid when they are told they have HPV, also known as human papillomavirus, they don’t really know what they are dealing with.

It doesn’t have to be this way. You can help dispel some of the myths and confusion around HPV by having open conversations with your kids.

They’ll be given the HPV vaccine at school, and will probably have questions about what it is.

How great would it be if you knew how to answer all their questions, so they felt informed, and – should they get it later in life – knew what it meant?

Talking to your kids about sexually transmitted infections, or anything sex related for that matter, can be awkward. But it doesn’t have to be.

As part of our series , we asked some parenting experts for tips on making it easier.

What are the basics of HPV?

To talk to your kid about HPV, you need to know what it is, how it spreads, how you test for it and what the risks are.

Most people don’t know that they have HPV. It can sometimes cause genital warts, but usually, it will be symptomless. It can spread even without symptoms, so people can be passing it on and not know.

This is why people will cervixes are encouraged to get tested every few years.

Women over the age of 25 who are registered with a GP will be offered smear tests every three or five years to check if they have HPV cells. In severe cases where the body isn’t getting rid of the virus on its own, doctors might offer surgery.

(Video) On Call for All Kids - What to Know about HPV

These screenings are available to anyone with a cervix, including trans men. But if you are registered as a man with your GP, you won’t be invited automatically.

In most cases, people’s bodies will fight off the HPV infection within around two years.

Sometimes, however, HPV can make people vulnerable to some cancers, including cancer of the cervix and anus.

HPV is spread through skin-to-skin contact during vaginal, anal and oral sex.

There is an HPV vaccine that has proven to be very successful. It has saved lives, but it isn’t being offered to everyone and doesn’t provide lifetime protection.

Right, now you’ve educated yourself, you can educate your kids.

How to talk to your kids about HPV

There’s no hard or fast rule for when to talk to your children about HPV.

However, the experts recommend doing it when your children are pre or early teens before they’ve started having sex.

Nancy Arulraj, founder of AllNaturalMothering, research officer and data scientist says one of the most important things you can do as a parent is to talk to your kids about HPV, so they can make informed decisions about their sexual health before they become sexually active.

Charlotte Johnson, a sex and relationships expert at MegaPleasure agrees: ‘Although HPV is usually harmless and goes away by itself, some types can lead to cancer or genital warts so it’s very important that as a parent you’re educating your children on this topic.’

Slowly building on your child’s understanding means that when they do become sexually active, they will understand the risks and how to practise safe sex.

Deciding on the right time to talk about the topic is hard, but that decision may be made for you when they are given the HPV vaccine at school.

Charlotte says the first dose of the HPV vaccine is routinely offered to girls and boys aged 12 and 13 in school Year 8.

(Video) Talking to your kids about cancer prevention and the HPV vaccine

The second dose is offered 6 to 24 months after the 1st dose.

‘Therefore, when their child gets the human papillomavirus (HPV) vaccine this will give you an opportunity to further inform your child,’ she adds.

Parenting expert Chizzy Chukwukere, who has worked in the childcare and education sector for over 10 years, says we can’t ignore the fact that kids talk a lot about sex at school.

So, while you think it’s too early, they could already be gossiping with their mates. Be prepared to answer questions.

When it comes to HPV, kids under 10 will struggle to grasp the ins and outs of it. To avoid confusing them, you can simply mention it is virus, Chizzzy says.

For older children, (and bare in mind, it is never too late to start the conversation), you can talk more frankly about STIs.

Chizzy says: ‘It’s important to educate them about their bodies, and how it can affect their health.

‘The internet is rife with misinformation so it’s your job as a parent to educate them fully. I would even suggest taking them to sexual health clinics.’

To be in a position where your kid would be happy comign to a sexual health clinic with you, you need to have built a ‘level of trust where so they can talk to you about anything,’ Chizzy says.

Be prepared to answer questions, and use pictures to re-enforce the point if you need to.

‘You need to be constantly reading so you can teach your kids, and practice your communication skills, and this something I practice myself,’ she adds.

Communication is key here. It has to be open, direct and factual.

How to have open conversations with your children

You’ve educated yourself, and decided when to have the conversation… now what?

(Video) Protecting Your Child From HPV

Nancy says it is necessary to talk openly about the virus with your kids in order to explain how it can be transmitted from person to person, even when there are no symptoms present.

It is therefore a priority, she adds, to maintain open communication with your children so that difficult conversations can be had more easily.

She adds: ‘When parents and children have a good relationship characterized by openness and communication, difficult conversations are less likely to escalate into arguments, and both parties are more likely to listen to and understand each other.

‘Additionally, open communication can help prevent misunderstandings and provide children with a support system when they need it most.

‘When children feel like they can talk openly with their parents about anything, it becomes easier to have tough conversations because there is already a foundation of trust and mutual respect.’

Practising open communication is simple: have daily conversations with your kids (if you see them every day), listen to them attentively, and responding to their needs.

Kids will talk openly when they feel comfortable and know they can share whatever is on their mind.

Another way to build this environment is through regular family meetings where everyone gets a chance to share what is going on with them.

‘This is a time for everyone to listen to each other without judgment or interruption,’ Nancy says.

You have to practice what you preach. Nancy explains: ‘If you want your kids to be open with you, they need to see that you are open and honest with them.’

It’s important to discuss sex and intimacy with your kids at an early age, to help them understand their own bodies and how to express themselves sexually.

Stay calm and open-minded, use proper anatomical terms, and avoid judgment or shame.

Be clear, concise, and honest. And always, above all, respect their needs and comfort levels, and make sure that they feel safe to ask questions.

(Video) The 6 things you need to know about HPV

You, me & HPV

This week, is looking at HPV and its related cancers from a range of perspectives.

By and large HPV isn't something to worry about - but it is something to be aware of.

HPV is something that eight in 10 of us will encounter at some stage of our lives. It's spread through skin-to-skin contact, not just penetrative sex. There is even some evidence to suggest it can spread through deep kissing.

It isn't tested for in a standard sexual health screening, so it's near impossible to know when or where a person might have contracted it or who they might have passed it onto.

For most people, their bodies will fight the virus off in around one to two years without any lasting effects. For some people however, it can make them more vulnerable to cancers of the cervix, anus, head and neck, penis, vagina and vulva.

Over this week, we'll be exploring the human issues that come with HPV and its related cancers.

For more health information, please visit Jo's Cervical Cancer Trust, The Eve Appeal, the No Man campaign and The Anal Cancer Foundation.

MORE : The most common myths around HPV debunked by doctors

MORE : Everything you need to know about HPV

MORE : How to talk to your partner about a HPV diagnosis – and if you even should

(Video) HPV. It’s about CANCER. Talk to your child’s doctor.


How long does it take for HPV to cause abnormal cells? ›

HPV-related cancers often take years to develop after getting an HPV infection. Cervical cancer usually develops over 10 or more years. There can be a long interval between being infected with HPV, the development of abnormal cells on the cervix and the development of cervical cancer.

Can you get HPV when you're a kid? ›

At what age can someone be infected with HPV? Anyone can be infected with HPV regardless of their age. For example, if a pregnant woman has HPV, her baby can be born with an HPV infection.

How long does it take for HPV to show up after exposure? ›

Often, HPV warts will appear three to six months after sexual relations with an infected person; or they may take months to appear; or they may never appear. Likewise, the interval between an infection with HPV and a cervical smear abnormality can vary from months to decades.

How do kids contract HPV? ›

The HPV infection is primarily spread through skin-to-skin contact. There are several risk factors that increase the chance of a child getting a HPV infection: Having a cut – The disease can enter the blood stream through an opening in the skin (like a cut).

Why is my body not clearing HPV? ›

Around 90% of HPV infections clear within 2 years. For a small number of women and people with a cervix, their immune system will not be able to get rid of HPV. This is called a persistent infection. A persistent HPV infection causes the cells of the cervix to change.

Can I pass HPV to my child by holding hands? ›

Even if a person delays sexual activity until marriage, or only has one partner, they are still at risk of HPV infection if their partner has been exposed. You cannot get HPV from: Toilet seats. Hugging or holding hands.

How long is HPV contagious? ›

Is HPV Contagious Forever? Most cases of HPV clear up on their own after one to two years, and you'll no longer be contagious once it leaves your system. However, the virus can remain dormant for years, and some people experience infections that stick around for much longer.

Can a mother pass on HPV to her child? ›

Vertical transmission of HPV from mother to fetus is known to occur. Indeed, up to 80% of neonates born to women with genital HPV have HPV DNA detectable in their nasopharyneal aspirate or oral mucosa [10]–[12], and this may persist for months or years.

Will I always test positive for HPV? ›

HPV spreads through sexual contact and is very common in young people — frequently, the test results will be positive. However, HPV infections often clear on their own within a year or two. Cervical changes that lead to cancer usually take several years — often 10 years or more — to develop.

How do you know when HPV is gone? ›

Most strains of HPV go away permanently without treatment. Because of this, it isn't uncommon to contract and clear the virus completely without ever knowing that you had it. HPV doesn't always cause symptoms, so the only way to be sure of your status is through regular testing. HPV screening for men isn't available.

Do I need to disclose HPV? ›

Unlike other STIs, there is no treatment for HPV, so it is not necessary to disclose HPV to current or previous sexual partners.

Can you pass HPV by sharing drinks? ›

HPV is passed through skin-to-skin contact, not through bodily fluids. Sharing drinks, utensils, and other items with saliva is very unlikely to transmit the virus.

Can kissing transmit HPV? ›

While sexual intercourse is the primary means of transmission, genital-to-genital interactions, oral-to-genital interactions, or deep (French) kissing can also spread the virus.

Can you pass HPV if you've been vaccinated? ›

There is a small chance that someone might still get genital warts after having all their HPV vaccine shots. The vaccine protects against 90% of the HPV strains that cause genital warts. But there are lots of different strains (types) of HPV and the vaccine cannot protect against them all.

What foods fights HPV? ›

Folate – This water-soluble B vitamin has been found to reduce the risk of cervical cancer in women who have HPV. Foods that are rich in folate include avocados, chickpeas, lentils, orange juice, romaine lettuce and strawberries.

How can I clear my body of HPV? ›

  1. Salicylic acid. Over-the-counter treatments that contain salicylic acid work by removing layers of a wart a little at a time. ...
  2. Imiquimod. This prescription cream might enhance your immune system's ability to fight HPV . ...
  3. Podofilox. ...
  4. Trichloroacetic acid.
12 Oct 2021

How much zinc should I take daily for HPV? ›

Zinc Sulfate 220mg twice daily for three months. Participant will take one 220mg tablet twice daily for three months.

Can low risk HPV cause abnormal cells? ›

Both the low risk types and the high risk types of HPV can cause abnormal cell changes in the cervix and abnormal Pap smear results.

How long does it take for HPV to cause CIN2? ›

CIN2/3 is considered a precursor of cervical cancer and is treated when detected, even though the possibility of regression to a normal state exists. Whereas CIN2/3 typically develops within a few years of infection with HPV (4–6), progression to invasive carcinoma is generally thought to require much more time.

How fast does cervical dysplasia progress? ›

Cervical dysplasia can take 10–30 years to progress into cervical cancer.

Can abnormal cells from HPV go away? ›

They usually go away on their own and do not require treatment. CIN 2 changes are moderate and are typically treated by removing the abnormal cells. However, CIN 2 can sometimes go away on its own. Some people, after consulting with their health care provider, may decide to have a colposcopy with biopsy every 6 months.


1. HPV Vaccine: Ask About It for Your Child
(Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC))
2. Talking to Parents and their Kids about the HPV Vaccine
(Vindico Medical Education)
3. Debunking HPV Myths
(CBS News)
4. Talking to Parents Who Think Their Kids Don’t Need HPV vaccine at Age 11 or 12: Dr. Savoy
(Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC))
5. Certain HPV-related cancers. Talk to your child’s doctor.
(Mirelle Paris)
6. The HPV Vaccine and Children
(Lee Health)
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